Welcome to FOMObox.
FOMObox will guide you through difficult decisions, big or small. None of the information you enter will be collected or saved once you close your browser tab.
**Ready to make a decision?**
[[Yes]]
[[No]]
*The FOMObox process was inspired by the book <a href="https://amzn.to/2ZRsORo"; target="_blank">Fear of Missing Out: Practical Decision Making in a World of Overwhelming Choice</a> by Patrick McGinnis. This site is not affiliated with Mr. McGinnis and is for entertainment purposes only.
Questions? Suggestions? I can be reached at wrentopher@gmail.com.*On the next page, we'll ask you to enter the decision you're struggling with.
<-- *If you want to change your answer any point moving forward, hit the undo button here, **not** the back button in your browser. To restart at any time, hit refresh.*
[[Enter a decision.]]It sounds like you need to restart.
[[Let's Start Over]] over again.
Even better, read the book <a href="https://amzn.to/2ZRsORo"; target="_blank">Fear of Missing Out: Practical Decision Making in a World of Overwhelming Choice</a> by Patrick McGinnis.Good news! It looks like your decision is no stakes. That means we're almost done.
Here's a quick (3 question) gut check before we move forward.
1) Are you likely to forget this decision in a week?
[[Yes, it won't really matter a week later.]]
[[No]] You've chosen low-stakes. Let's just make sure that this really is a low-stakes decision, so you can be confident in the results.
[[I don't expect to care about or remember this decision for more than a month.]]
Actually, I think this decision is:
[[No Stakes]]
[[High Stakes]] This is a high-stakes decision. You believe this choice is likely to have a significant, longterm impact on your ability to thrive.
Whew! No pressure.
The first step will be to tackle FOMO.
**Click below to get started.**
[[Step 1: Aspirational FOMO]](set: $Option1 to (prompt: "Option 1:"))
(set: $Option2 to (prompt: "Option 2:"))
Congratulations. The the AI has reviewed your options and would recommend:
(either: $Option1, $Option2)Is this decision insignificant?
[[Yes, it won't have much impact on my time, money, or anyone else.]]
[[No]] Great. The last question McGinnis recommends for no-stakes decisions is:
"Can you abide by your choice, no matter the outcome?"
[[Yes. I'm ready to enter my options.]]
If you choose this option, be ready to enter your top two choices in the dialog boxes.
[[No]] Great. Just to be careful, though, do you expect this decision to have any major long-term impact on yourself or others? Consider your finances, time, health, or anything else that's really important to you.
[[It's probably not life-altering.]]
On second thought, I think this decision is:
[[No Stakes]]
[[High Stakes]] Great. Like no-stakes decisions, the last question McGinnis recommends for low-stakes decisions is:
"Can you abide by your choice, no matter the outcome?"
[[Yes, I'm ready to make a decision.]]
[[No]] Not so fast! There are a couple more steps for Low-Stakes decisions.
Think of someone you know who's an expert, or recently had some experience, in this particular topic.
[[I have someone in mind.]]
[[I don't want to ask for help.]]
(set: $advisor to (prompt: "I'm going to talk to..."))
Great! Is $advisor an employee or someone you can delegate to?
[[Sure, I can delegate tasks to]] $advisor.
[[No, I can't delegate tasks to]]$advisor.You should go ahead and let $advisor to make the decision. At worst, you might get a recommendation you'd never have thought of. You might also be giving an employee a welcome chance to step up to the plate.
[[Click here when you've spoken to]] $advisor.So you have someone you can ask for help, but you can't pawn your decision off on them.
Take a moment to come up with an open ended question to ask $advisor.
"Hey $advisor, how can I decide $myQuestionV1?"
"Hi $advisor, do you have any data that would help be decide $myQuestionV1?"
[[Click here when you've spoken to]] $advisor.
(set: $advice to (prompt: "The recommendation I received is to..."))
Great! After plugging $advisor's advice into our highly-advanced quantum AI, it determined that you should:
**$advice**
**You've Completed This Path.**
[[Save My Answers]]
[[Let's Start Over]] If you're feeling indecisive, one culprit may be aspirational FOMO.
Accoring to McGinnis, aspirational FOMO is when you think "that a thing or experience is better than what you have in front of you at the moment."
[[To start, let's turn the decision you entered earlier into a question.]]Take some time to be really sure about what question you're asking. The more concise you can be, the better. Your question shouldn't need to be more than a single sentence.
Example question: Should I quit my job to launch a business?
[[Enter my question.]](set: $myQuestion to (prompt: "Should I ..."))
You entered:
**Should I $myQuestion**
Make sure that you haven't presented yourself with a false dichotomy. Your choices might not be as limited as you think. You should carefully consider whether there are changes you could make to any of your options that would make them clear winners. For example, if you're choosing between two jobs, is there a benefit you could ask either employer for that would make this choice a whole lot easier?
If you need to, use the back buttons to edit your answers. It's important to get The Question right.
Next up, we're going to set some criteria.
[[Criteria 1: Can I justify this choice?]]You're about to enter 5 reasons to justify your choice.
[[Ready?]]
[[There's no way I can think of five reasons I'd want this.]](set: $criteriareason1 to (prompt: "Reason 1 is..."))
(set: $criteriareason2 to (prompt: "Reason 2 is..."))
(set: $criteriareason3 to (prompt: "Reason 3 is..."))
(set: $criteriareason4 to (prompt: "Reason 4 is..."))
(set: $criteriareason5 to (prompt: "Reason 5 is..."))
You entered:
$criteriareason1
$criteriareason2
$criteriareason3
$criteriareason4
$criteriareason5
This choice is looking good so far, but let's see how it stacks up to other important criteria. That way, you can be confident your decision is the right one.
[[Ready for the next critera.]]
[[There's no way I can think of five reasons I'd want this.]]It sounds like you have your answer.
This is the question you entered earlier:
Should I $myQuestion
If you can't come up with five things that justify your choice, that's probably a strong indicator that you shoudl **not** make this choice.
You've completed this path, but if you want, you can enter a new question.
[[Enter my question.]]
"Can I afford this? How much will it cost? What else can I do with my money?"
[[Yes, I think I can afford it.]]
[[No, I can't afford it.]]Great! The next question is:
"Can I make this choice without sacrificing other, more important goals? Do I have time for this? How else could I invest my time and energy?"
[[I can make this choice without sacrificing any goals that I know are more important.]]
[[I know there are better ways to spend my time and energy.]]This is the question you entered earlier:
**Should I $myQuestion**
If you can't afford it, or you know it would be better to spend the money somewhere else, you should **not** make this choice.
**You've Completed This Path.**
[[Save My Answers]]
[[Let's Start Over]] Great. The next question is:
"Can I see a clear return on investment if I choose this option? What am I going to get out of this? Is it tangible, emotional, or both?"
[[Yes, I can see a clear return on investment.]]
[[There's not a whole lot of upside for me.]]This is the question you entered earlier:
**Should I $myQuestion**
If you are sure there are better ways to spend your time and energy, you should **not** make this choice.
**You've Completed This Path.**
[[Save My Answers]]
[[Let's Start Over]] So far so good! The last part of this section is a practical matter:
"Can I actually make this happen? Is this opportunity even available to me, or shoudl I be focusing on other oppportunities that are also attractive but far more realistic?"
[[I'm reasonably confident this option is in my reach. It's not impossible.]]
[[I'm being pretty unrealistic. This choice would be like betting my savings on winning the lottery.]]This is the question you entered earlier:
**Should I $myQuestion**
If there's little or no upside to this choice, you're better off doing something else. You should **not** make this choice.
**You've Completed This Path.**
[[Save My Answers]]
[[Let's Start Over]] This decision has made it through several hurdles already. Are there any other criteria you have?
We attempted to address some minimum requirements for any decision you'll make. Whatever choice you make, it should be affordable, possible, and worthwhile
If you have any other minimum satisfactory requirements, you should include them now. For example, if you're making a decision about a new job, and a short commute is absolutely necessary, enter that now.
[[Yes, I have more criteria.]]
[[Ready to go!]]This is the question you entered earlier:
**Should I $myQuestion**
Maybe you're just a huge risk taker, but I would seriously reconsider this decision. Based on your earlier answer, it looks like it's not even feasible for you.
**You've Completed This Path.**
[[Save My Answers]]
[[Let's Start Over]] (set: $moreCriteria to (prompt: "These are my other requirements..."))
You added these requirements:
$moreCriteria
Sound good?
[[Ready to go!]]Sometimes you need to focus on making the right investment, before you focus on maximizing your investment. You have to start with what matters the most.
The rule applies to all sorts of choices. Know your bottom line. You’re much less likely to regret your decision if you focus on choosing the option that best satisfies your criteria. We'll cover this more, but you want to avoid agonizing over maximizing your decision.
[[There's a clear winner! Only one option really satisfies my criteria.]]
[[I'm still stuck. I need more info.]](set: $discovery to (prompt: "In my fact-finding I learned that..."))
You said that in your research you discovered that **$discovery**
A word of warning: according to the famous psychologist Paul Slovic, you should focus on no more than five to ten data points. After your five most important pieces of information, additional data may make you more confident, but it is unlikely to make you any more accurate.
Focusing on the most significant facts you've discovered:
[[Can you draw any conclusions from these facts?]]
Remember, sometimes you might not have a clear path, but you know the general direction you want to go. For this exercise, a general direction might be enough.(set: $discConclusions to (prompt: "Based on my research, I think..."))
Based on your research, you drew the conclusion(s) that:
**Based on my reasearch, I think $discConclusions**
Now imagine that you are going to give a recommendation to someone else who's in very similar circumstances. A friend, boss, family member, or a coworker has to make the same decision you do. You have to give them a recommendation based on the facts you've discovered and the conclusions you've drawn from them. What do you recommend?
[[From the facts you discovered and the conclusions you drew from them, you might recommend...]](set: $recommendation to (prompt: "Based on the evidence so far I might recommend..."))
Based on the evidence you've gathered so far and the conclusions you've drawn, you're leaning towards ** $recommendation **
If you feel like you've found an answer, you might not need to keep going. But, if you're still stuck in your decision, there's more to cover.
[[Next up, "Herd FOMO."]]In addition to aspirational FOMO, where the grass seems greener on the other side, there's also "herd FOMO."
When you're surrounded by people who are all doing the same thing, it's tempting to go along with the crowd. If your friends or everyone you see on social media wants something, you might start to want it too.
Take a moment to ask yourself:
"DO I actually want to do this, or am I just following the herd?"
[[I actually don't want this. I'm just following the herd.]]
[[I'm not totally sure.]]
[[This is all me.]]So, you're facing a high-stakes, potentially life-altering decision, and it's all because your friends are making you feel like you're missing out.
That's not a great reason to make a choice. You'll want to give this option a pass.
**You've Completed This Path. **
[[Save My Answers]]
[[Let's Start Over]] Take some time to ask people outside your friend group what they think. Read articles from other sources. Search for information that might contradict what the herd is saying.
[[I actually don't want this. I'm just following the herd.]]
[[I'm not totally sure.]]
[[This is all me.]]This is the question you entered earlier:
**Should I $myQuestion**
At this point, the answer is probably yes, go for it. You should feel pretty confident that you've done your due dillegence. Even though it's a big decision, you've taken steps to ensure that it's realistic, financially feasible, and your not merely driven by FOMO.
It seems like you have some pretty compelling reasons behind you.
[[I'm still stuck!]]
**RECAP**
Here's a recap of all your possible answers so far. Depending on what path you chose, some of these may be blank or show a "0":
If you said your decision was high-stakes, you defined your question as:
**Should I $myQuestion**
You also had the following compelling reasons for that choice:
**$criteriareason1
$criteriareason2
$criteriareason3
$criteriareason4
$criteriareason5**
You also identified some pretty important criteria your choice had to fulfill:
**$moreCriteria**
You did some research and discovered that:
**$discovery**
It led you to conclude that:
**$discConclusions**
Based on those conclusions, you'd send this memo/recommendation to a friend in a similar situation:
**$recommendation**
To learn more, read <a href="https://amzn.to/2ZRsORo"; target="_blank">Fear of Missing Out: Practical Decision Making in a World of Overwhelming Choice</a>
**Further Reading**
<a href="https://amzn.to/3hvHcF0"; target="_blank">Decisive: How to Make Better Choices in Life and Work</a>
<a href="https://amzn.to/2ZVlcgH0"; target="_blank">Thinking in Bets</a>
<a href="https://amzn.to/39o4ppI"; target="_blank">The Decision Book</a>
<a href="https://amzn.to/3eSXmq9"; target="_blank">Thinking Fast and Slow</a>
It's possible you have McGinnis's other "F.O.":
**Fear of a Better Option**
FOBO is a two pronged approach to indecision.
"1) Holding out for something better."
"2) Preserving option value."
FOBO "originates with the desire to have the best - to maximize - and an aversion to settling for second best... the psychological equivalent of endlessly flipping through television channels to see if there's something better on."
You want to make the best possible choice, and that becomes an excuse to make no choice at all. Meanwhile, you return again and again to choices you already discarded, causing yourself extra stress.
**Stop and ask yourself if you have a "frontrunner?" Even if all of your options are equally good (or equally bad), is there a "leader of the pack...favorite [or] benchmark" option?**
[[I guess one option sort of stands out.]]
[[My choices are really all totally equal.]]Here are the answers you entered. Screenshot or copy them, because once you exit, there's no way to guarantee you'll be able to get these answers back.
If you said your decision was no-stakes, these are the options you entered:
**$Option1**
**$Option2**
If you said the decision was low-stakes, you chose $advisor to help you out, and they recommended
**$advice**
If you said your decision was high-stakes, you defined your question as
Should I $myQuestion
You also had the following compelling reasons for that choice:
**$criteriareason1**
**$criteriareason2**
**$criteriareason3**
**$criteriareason4**
**$criteriareason5**
You also identified some pretty important criteria your choice had to fulfill:
**$moreCriteria**
You did some research and discovered that:
**$discovery**
It led you to conclude that:
**$discConclusions**
Based on those conclusions, you'd send this memo/recommendation to a friend:
**$recommendation**
To Restart this Exercise, go back to [[Let's Start Over]] At this point, you've probably eliminated any really bad options. You've done your due dilligence. You can't predict the future.
Without a crystal ball, you can never be 100 percent certain you've made the best possible decision. Everything left on the table probably feels close to equal, and whichever option you choose, you can feel confident that you made a good decision with the information you had.
Since all the options are relatively equal, and you've already eliminated the bad ones, go with your frontrunner. There may be no clear path out of the woods, so you'll have to choose the best path you can, and run with it. Otherwise, you'll never move forward.
Sure, you'll have to discard other options that seem almost as good. McGinnis suggests you think of pruning options like <a href="https://amzn.to/2WU7GIl"; target="_blank">Marie Kondo's Lifechanging Magic of Tidying up</a> . Hoarding options is like hoarding stuff. It's ultimately holding you back. Free yourself from the burden of holding on to so many options.
By agonizing, your just causing yourself more stress, and increasing the likelihood that your frontrunner will become unavailable. At this point, it's time to go with your frontrunner, even if you can't be certain it's the best possible option.
**You've Completed This Path. **
[[Save My Answers]]
[[Let's Start Over]] By this time, you should have eliminated any options that really don't work. You're left with only options that seem equally desirable. The differences between them are ultimately so small that you can't make a decision on your own.
In some ways, the decision-making process at this point becomes a lot like the decision-making process for no- or low- stakes decisions. It's time to hand your decision over to a third party, because agonizing isn't going to make your life better.
Is there an expert you can ask to make the decision for you? Is there someone with experience?
[[I have someone in mind.]]
[[Nope! I don't have any experts I can go to for help. There's no one who can make this decision for me.]]
[[Is there anything else you can recommend?]]Wow. You really are in a bind. I guess I'll have to make the decision for you. Sometimes, there's no clear path out of the woods. To get anywhere, you'll have to pick a direction and run with it.
Get ready to enter your top two options.
Are you ready?
[[Yes. I'm ready to enter my options.]]
[[Is there anything else you can recommend?]]Congratulations! There's only one option that satisfies your basic critera, and you've figured out what it is. Choose this option, and you should be satisfied with your decision.
**You've Completed This Path. **
[[Save My Answers]]
[[Let's Start Over]] Earlier, you said these were your top five reasons for considering this decision:
$criteriareason1
$criteriareason2
$criteriareason3
$criteriareason4
$criteriareason5
This is a good time to reconsider the reasons driving your decisions. Are they all based on practical facts, or were any of them just wishful thinking? Discard any reasoning that is unrealistic or unfounded.
**Can you find more information to guide your decision? You may need to take some time and come back to this exercise later.**
McGinnis recommends that you search for facts that "chip away at the asymmetry of information that is clouding your judgement."
A word of warning: don't just ask around for advice (that will give you more aspirational FOMO) and don't let research turn into procrastination.
If you're considering a new job, don't ask if you'll get promoted. Ask specific questions, like how quickly, or how often, do employees in this position get promoted?
**Now it's time to record your results in the form of a memo. Treat it like you're texting advice to a friend who has the same problem you do.**
[[What did you discover?]]I'm going to diverge from McGinnis's book for a minute and recommend one other technique: the premortem.
A pre-mortem is simple. Grab a piece of paper, and divide it into four sections. The top half can be Choice A, and the bottom half can be Choice B. Make the right half of the page the best possible realistic outcome, and the left half the worst possible realistic outcome. You can also do this with more than two options.
Now, try to imagine the best and worst possible outcomes for each choice. What would it look like if things worked out really well? What would it look like if things went terribly wrong? Ask yourself this question for each option on your list.
The only rule is to be reasonable. The outcomes you imagine can be really bad or really good, as long as they’re realistic.
You might identify risks or problems you hadn’t thought. You might realize that one option has a lot of potential upside and relatively little downside. Either way, a pre-mortem will help you put your imagination in perspective.
**You've Completed This Path. **
[[Save My Answers]]
[[Let's Start Over]] (set: $myQuestionV1 to (prompt: "This is the decision I'm struggling with right now."))
**You entered:
$myQuestionV1**
Which option best describes your decision?
[[No Stakes]]
No Stakes choices don't have significant impacts or longterm consequences. Which restaurant you go to for dinner, or whether you order an appetizer, are probably no-stakes decisions.
[[Low Stakes]]
Low stakes choices have consequences, but they're not likely to be life-altering. They often involve small investments or small risks. If you're not sure you'll even remember your choice two months from now, it's probably a low- or no-stakes decision.
[[High Stakes]]
McGinnis describes high-stakes decisions as "fundamental strategic decisions" and "the choices you must absolutely get right if you want to thrive." These are the choices that will still matter two months or years from now.Ok. Do any of your personal values impact this decision?
[[Yes. My personal values tell me what I should do.]]
[[No. I don't think my personal values have much impact on this decision.]]This is a low-stakes decision. Don't do something you'll regret later. It won't pay off. Instead, you should do what best aligns with your values.
**You've completed this path.**
You should now know what decision to make. Feel free to close your browser, or choose the option below to restart.
[[Let's Start Over]]
The FOMObox process was inspired by the book <a href="https://amzn.to/2ZRsORo"; target="_blank">Fear of Missing Out: Practical Decision Making in a World of Overwhelming Choice</a> by Patrick McGinnis.This site is not affiliated with Patrick McGinnis and is for entertainment purposes only.Great! Your conscience will be clear no matter what you decide.
How do you feel right now?
[[I feel pretty positive! Overall, I'm relatively content, and don't feel angry, stressed, or tired.]]
[[I feel pretty negative! Overall, I am angry, stressed, or tired.]](set: $enjoyThings1 to (prompt: "I feel happiest when I'm..."))
(set: $enjoyThings2 to (prompt: "I feel most content and relaxed when I'm..."))
You entered:
I feel happiest when I'm $enjoyThings1
I feel most content and relaxed when I'm $enjoyThings2
This is a low-stakes decision, and you're experiencing some negative emotions. Is there a choice or option that will make you feel better? Does any option line up well with your answers above?
[[Yes. I know which option will make me feel better.]]
[[None of these options will fix my mood.]]
Good to hear! Let's take it to the next level. Think about the sorts of things that make you feel most fulfilled and accomplished. Where do you really excel?
[[I'm at my best or most accomplished when...]]Sorry to hear. This will help.
What activities or situations make you feel happy, relaxed, or put you in a flow state?
[[Things I enjoy...]]Great! You've already said that your conscience is clear and this is a low-stakes decision. Go ahead and choose the option that makes you feel best.
**You've completed this path.**
[[Let's Start Over]] (set: $accomplishedThing to (prompt: "I feel most accomplished after I've ..."))
You said:
"I feel most accomplished after I've $accomplishedThing."
Wow! That's **quite** a skill.
Early on, you said that you were struggling with this decision:
$myQuestionV1
Is there a choice or option that will make you feel that sense of accomplishment?
[[Yes. I know what will make me feel most accomplished.]]
[[Nope! None of my options will make me feel a greater sense of accomplishment.]]Winning! In this case, you should choose the option that gives you the greatest sense of accomplishment.
**You've completed this path.**
You should now know what decision to make. Feel free to close your browser, or choose the option below to restart.
[[Let's Start Over]]
The FOMObox process was inspired by the book <a href="https://amzn.to/2ZRsORo"; target="_blank">Fear of Missing Out: Practical Decision Making in a World of Overwhelming Choice</a> by Patrick McGinnis.This site is not affiliated with Patrick McGinnis and is for entertainment purposes only.Alright. At this point, it's time to enter your top options and let our advanced AI make a decision for you.
[[Yes. I'm ready to enter my options.]]
[[Let's Start Over]] That's unfortunate! At this point, it's time to enter your top options and let our advanced AI make a decision for you.
[[Yes. I'm ready to enter my options.]]
[[Let's Start Over]]